Archive | March, 2013
25 Mar

I just came back from a family dinner and I just can’t take it anymore.
It’s like I’m invisible, no one cares, no one includ me in anything, it’s like I’m a burden on everyone.
No one cares about me, no one loves me, I just want this to end.

:(

18 Mar

It’s amazing how one person can just ruin your all day, make you feel like staying in bed and just make you feel like shit. 

And it’s not because of something he said or done, it’s just the presence of him that makes you feel down. It’s worst when you stuck in the same house with him and the only time you feel like getting out of your room is when he’s out, and he’s not out a lot. 

And you try to get out of the house but you can’t find a job because you have no experience, or no more will because every job interview ends with rejection.

And it’s just…. You just want to crawl under a rock and die.   

Aside 2 Mar

Sometimes I really don’t know if some people are really THAT stupid or if they just don’t care. 

I mean, they see that they hurt someone, or make them feel uncomfortable and they just keep acting the same way. 

Alone

2 Mar

I don’t have a lot of friends, I’m not a big talker, mostly because I have nothing to talk about. I have a boring life, I don’t have a spouse, right now I don’t have a job… I really am a boring person who just love to watch TV and movies. 

I don’t know how to act in conversations, I have nothing to offer. I mean I take interest in other people, I ask them how they are, but when people ask me how I’m doing I just say “I’m fine” because I really don’t think that anyone really care and wants to hear how shitty I feel, and I don’t want to burden them with my depression.  

I know that it’s my fault, but I really don’t know what to do because it’s feels like nobody care about me, not even my own family. I mean people always say “let’s do this” and “let’s do that” and this are just words, we never end up doing “this” or “that”. Even at my last job, when my mother past away no one called (except for to ask when I’m coming back), and when someone else lost a loved one everyone suddenly cared. 

Is it me? Just because I don’t like to share MY feelings does it make me seem like a really shitty person? 

I just feel like if I tell people what I really think they will run away.